I said “Hi!” To 347 Guys on Bumble and Only 2 Messaged me Back

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Dating apps are tough! I’ve tried them all. My friends told me I was too picky on Tinder when I said I didn’t like getting a dick pic before we’d even exchanged casual pleasantries! They said getting a dick pic is the new calling card, and at least you know what you’re getting into, but I gotta be honest, I’m not into light sexual harassment. So we decided bumble was the solution, women get to send the first message and then guys decide if they want to respond! So at least I’d get to say hi before getting a big ol sausage in my face right? So I joined, and I sent 347 messages that just said “Hi 🙋🏼” cute right? But out of 347 accounts, only two replied! Admittedly, some of them could be bots so we’ll put it at 325 messages being ignored, conservatively. Have you ever been rejected by 325 people all at once? Well I have and I’m here to say it sucks. But I’m happy to say I have found true love. Was it one of the 2 responses? No, those were both dick pics. I accidentally clicked on a different bumble when I was checking my messages, one thing led to another and lo and behold I’m in love with Bumble the abominable snow man from the stop motion Rudolph holiday special. We’re visiting his parents at the North Pole this fall.

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Eating Paleo? Try Dating Paleo!

 

It happened again, instead of having an actual conversation with my significant other, I spent thirty minutes googling solutions to our conflict, and then I just texted a casual response. This exchange really got me thinking, what did people do before they could google stupid relationship problems or personal issues? Ask other people? Give up? People are all about eating paleo, but why not try dating paleo!

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Seven Things to Leave at His Apartment to Ensure He Never Forgets You

The start to relationships can get a little weird, a little hazy. Sometimes it’s hard to know if you’re really dating someone or if you’re just hanging out or what the H is going on! DearSilvr might be like “hey, have a serious conversation with the person you’re interested in dating!” But instead, consider this option, you can just leave stuff all over his apartment to make sure whoever comes there next knows that you own the place! writer’s note: thank you to my friend Danielle for bouncing this idea around with me. 

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The Types of Men You’ll Date in Your 20s Before Gravity Renders Your Body Unlovable

Dating in your 20s is the dreaded burden we reluctantly force ourselves to keep enduring. A plethora of aps like tinder, bumble, ok cupid, along with the constant threat of human interaction, are all set up with one goal in mind: to help us get together. However, more options doesn’t necessarily mean good options. Though you’re sure to encounter innumerable dating missteps, these are the types of men you will inevitably end up dating (before your body is ruined by the cruel passing of time).

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