We’ve all been there. You open a pack of peeps one Spring day, but instead of eating them you decide to give them each a parcel of your land in exchange for their service in times of war. You’re their king now.
You must be a fair King, make sure you’re not asking too much of them. Only engage in wars with the chocolate bunnies when they’re being real dicks.
Don’t recreate the children’s crusades. Or any of the crusade. Just stay in your space dude.
Make sure your peeps know you love them and that you’ll protect them because you’re a giant human and they’re just marshmallow candies.
Don’t put them in the microwave just to see them get all fat and weird.