My First Boyfriend’s Mix CD

I got my first real, real, real boyfriend when I was 14 and like any good budding emo kid, he asked me out with a mix CD. When we broke up, I did break that CD in half and throw it out the window of a car, BUT I have made a Spotify playlist of the mix, or what I remember of it, and now for the pleasure of you all, I’m going to analyze that mix CD.

1) Bohemian Like You- The Dandy Warhols. I will always love this song. It’s been in a lot of commercials; like a lot, usually people smiling or putting surfboards into their compact SUVs. Do I drive a compact SUV because of this song? Omg, I bet I do. This song also led to me talk to my cool World History teacher about The Dandy Warhols, and he suggested I watch the documentary on them and their feud with the Brian Jonestown Massacre and that was the beginning of my love of feuding. If you ever ask me what kind of music I like, “songs you hear in the background of commercials” is probably a really apt decision. Yeah, this is how Matt told me he liked me.

2) Never Meant- American Football. This song was my introduction to Mike Kinsella of Owen. If you’ve never been an angsty teen listening to Owen, you haven’t lived. Transport yourself back through time and really feel it. There’s a really great Owen cover of “Femme Fatale” that you should really just listen to instead of this American Football song, sorry Matt.

3) All We Ever Needed- The Early November. This song is like a rom-com, wrapped in a sappy high school movie, written down in a love song. Like, you should definitely be listening to this song while looking sadly out a window. This song is very high school because they talk about watching tv in your room and now I’m an adult and I watch TV in my living room.

4) Lila- Bright Eyes. But like, you knew this was coming. You thought it was going to be Lua, but no baby no, this one is much more romantic. I’m sorry I can’t see you through the black streaks of eyeliner my tears are leaving on my face. It took me a really long time to find this song again after I threw this CD out of my moving vehicle. I think I still really believe Conor Oberst is the real voice of our generation, sorry Lena Dunham. No one has captured my old millenial heart like that little emo kid.

5) I’ll Catch You- The Get Up Kids.  Peyton from One Tree Hill had a Get Up Kids shirt and I thought it made her so punk rock. I also had a Get Up Kids shirt and poster as I cruised through my adolescent emotions. My favorite song was really “Holy Roman Style;” they also do a good Bowie cover of Suffragette City if that’s more your vibe than this sappy love song. This song does pick up about 3 minutes in and you’re like, oh shit is this a romance song or a break up song. ISN’T EVERY SONG BOTH?

6) I Love You- The Dandy Warhols.  Please Matt, this is a little serious for a 14 year olds mix tape, plus I am just now your official girlfriend. Put this song on and look real deep into your lover’s eyes and if they don’t think it’s super creepy, marry the shit out of them. Eye contact is SO important.

7) Nothing Better- The Postal Service. I’ll literally never say a  bad word about the Postal Service. You can pry Give Up from my cold dead hands, after you crack my ribs and repair THIS BROKEN HEART. I know you’re really tired of the Iron and Wine “Such Great Heights” cover, but this album is GOOD, and nostalgic, and perfect. OMG MATT SO GOOD.

8) Lives- Modest Mouse. This song is so serious for a crush CD. This song is so serious for a 26 year old contemplating what she really wants out of life. Modest Mouse is a band that follows you your whole life, you hipster weirdo, and I’ll absolutely never forget that this was the first song of theirs that I heard. “Gravity Rides Everything” is another song that makes you want to load your surfboard into your compact SUV, but it’s worth it.

9) Volcano- Damien Rice. Again though Matt, maybe not the most romantic Damien Rice song you could’ve picked? Like maybe, idk literally any other Damien Rice song? This one is really sad. I’ve had the pleasure of seeing Damien Rice, front row, twice. And he still remains one of the best artists I’ve ever seen live. I know, I know you’ve heard the Closer Soundtrack, but like, it’s more than that. Isn’t it? Idk, maybe they played him on Grey’s Anatomy too.

10) Punk As Fuck- The American Analog Set. My mom gave me side eye over the title of this song. I had to censor it on our Itunes. I don’t know anything about this band, but this song was very sweet and very good for a first boyfriend’s mix CD.

There were like 20 songs on this CD, but I don’t remember all of them, some of them were probably pretty shitty because we can’t be cool all the time. This is the age when I just wanted to be Kate Hudson’s character in Almost Famous. I didn’t know anything. I still don’t know anything. But isn’t it fun to reminisce?


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