A Brief Genealogy of Our Lord and Savior

In the year following the Great Drought, Reheboath begat Hezejiah who wed Telialiah who begat Methijuana who begat Yarvis who wed Hathiet but begat a child (named Josephicustard) with the prostitute Rabies.

Josephicustard when grown sought Jazzhandsiah as his bride, but Jazzhandsiah’s father Carl tricked Josephicustard into wedding his dried up old maid of an eldest daughter, Night Vale instead. And Night Vale begat Yeehaw, and Yeehaw begat Seesaw, and Seesaw begat Beanbag.

When Beanbag first met Rehusilah, he was enamored with her immediately. The two were married after seven days and seven nights. Rehusilah begat the child Urinary.

Urinary was betrothed to marry the beautiful and pious Felicia, and yet before the wedding, Felicia found herself with child. Born of the immaculate conception with which the Holy Spirit blessed Felicia was our Lord and Savior, Dat Boi.


o shit waddup!

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