Your Weekly Horoscope (Written by Someone Going on Vacation This Week)

Welcome to your Weekly SuperGlooze Horoscope!

I have three (THREE!!) more days until I get to tell work to suck it and get out of town for an extended weekend, and I can hardly wait. Vacation season is now upon us, so here are your astrological travel tips.

ARIES: You’re going to forget something on your next trip. I would stake money on it. Try this checklist. Thank me later.

TAURUS: Work for a while and save up your money for one of those fancy luxury vacations. You need true relaxation, not couch surfing and last-minute, frantic schedule planning.

GEMINI: You seem to always have someone to travel with or to, but never take companionship or hospitality for granted.

CANCER: Stop hemming and hawing about it and just go already! You’ll figure it out just fine once you’re there, and you won’t regret the experience.

LEO: Give yourself a day or two after a trip before returning to work. Knowing you, you’ll need the recovery. I promise it won’t be wasted time.

VIRGO: If your friends would rather go to the beach than visit historical landmarks, either travel alone (if anyone can do it, it’s you) or find some folks with similar interests to vacation with.

LIBRA: You don’t have to take it on yourself if your travel companions are being cranky grumpuses. It’s okay to have fun even when others aren’t. That’s on them, not you.

SCORPIO: I know you get the urge to go off the radar, but just make sure you’re not leaving your loved ones worried or in the dark.

SAGITTARIUS: You’re going camping again, aren’t you? There is nothing I can teach you, here. Watch out for bears I guess?

CAPRICORN: Go big if you want to. You know you’ve earned it.

AQUARIUS: Things do tend to work themselves out, but you have to have some semblance of a travel plan. At least pretend to try to be prepared.

PISCES: Yes, it still counts as vacation if you spend the entire time in bed.

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