Hilarious Jokes to Tell Your Male Friends

Men say they love funny women, yet they never seem to appreciate your jokes. What could you possibly be doing wrong? It may seem nonsensical, but every woman needs to learn that certain types of jokes are only funny when men tell them. You can’t go about this whole comedy thing the same way a man does, honey! That’s just fighting biology.

Don’t panic, though. Yes, you too can be funny. You just have to know what jokes are actually funny to say to a man when you’re not one. Here are some to get you started:

“I’m uncomfortable.”

What’s funnier than a woman having feelings? Tell this joke to your male friends, and they are guaranteed to laugh up a storm. Go ahead and try it. You’ll either feel incredibly popular or incredibly devalued!

“That’s rude and inappropriate.”

You might not get a huge laugh right away with this joke, but it’s the perfect jumping-off point for your (naturally more comedically gifted) male friends to riff together. Watch your male friends banter with each other, getting even ruder and more inappropriate by turns, upping the ante to its natural comedic apex. By the time they’re calling you a “worthless bitch” you’ll all be laughing too hard to breathe! Just remember that no one will remember you set up and initiated this great chain of jokes. They’ll only remember the hilarious, envelope-pushing comments they made themselves. But we don’t do it for the credit. We do it to bring joy to the lives of the men who tolerate us, of course!

“Your input is unwelcome here.”

This one-liner is perfect for a quick, hearty laugh. It works because of its sheer absurdity. Can you even imagine a scenario in which a man’s input would actually be unwelcome? Exactly. The proposition itself is wildly hilarious. 

“Please stop talking about me that way.”

This is such a great piece of satire to break out. Of course, all men know that when you say this to them, what you actually want is for them to continue to talk about you in an even more egregious manner. Worried they may not catch the irony? Don’t! No man will ever miss the cue to continue his inappropriate comments about your body, your sexuality or your past emotional trauma. What fun!

“I don’t want to discuss this anymore.”

LOL. As if! We always want to talk about what the men in our lives want to talk about, and they know it. Follow this one up with a cheeky wink, and you male friend will be thinking about this killer one-liner all day. (Or at least until one of his bros tells a funnier one.)

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